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Concealable Weapons

1. xymonau13 May 2012, 12:35 GMT +02:00

The language in this makes me cringe, but it is genuinely funny.

http://dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=84

74. xymonau7 July 2012, 14:01 GMT +02:00

I live in the sub tropics and I happen to be bald. Try harder.

75. happyture8 July 2012, 1:33 GMT +02:00

Ha ha,,on special offer hair growth cream $40.00 non refundable if opened :O)

76. xymonau8 July 2012, 4:29 GMT +02:00

I have wigs. Dozens of 'em. You're not doing too well, are you? Lift your game, man!

77. happyture9 July 2012, 9:02 GMT +02:00

Im, selling Elocution DVD's specially for the Australian market, $200 each which includes a free table condiment set Bargain :O)

78. xymonau9 July 2012, 10:49 GMT +02:00

Electrocution? Is this some kind of sick cult thing or something? Anyway, we duzzent b'leeve in electrocution. We torks good an' propper.

79. happyture9 July 2012, 13:44 GMT +02:00

Humm, so i see, i take it your not interested then, what about these large vases,,there made to look like blenders you'll love them, one for $20 or two for $35, grab a bargain there going fast :O)

80. xymonau9 July 2012, 15:06 GMT +02:00

ROFL! They flippin' ARE blenders! Where'd you pinch them?

81. happyture9 July 2012, 18:41 GMT +02:00

Im afraid at this price i can not disclose the where about's of the supplier :O(

82. xymonau10 July 2012, 11:22 GMT +02:00

Perhaps the local constabulary might be able to help me?

83. happyture13 July 2012, 7:22 GMT +02:00

Oh if your going to be silly i shall close my suitcase and vanish............................

84. xymonau14 July 2012, 16:39 GMT +02:00

Well, I won't need to buy one, anyway. The flowers eventually died, and I got my blender back.

85. happyture15 July 2012, 15:32 GMT +02:00

The words, Tight as a ducks bottom springs to mind :o)

86. xymonau17 July 2012, 10:05 GMT +02:00

Very shallow springs, those.

87. happyture17 July 2012, 18:28 GMT +02:00

Ha ha ha :O)

88. xymonau4 August 2012, 9:50 GMT +02:00

I got out of hospital yesterday after being in about 15 days. They still don't know what is causing this fever, but they have ruled out everything sinister, and because my temps are getting lower through the day, they sent me home. I am so sick I can hardly manage. I can'T type properly, and I feel really unable to cope, Mike. I just wanted to let you know what has been happening.

89. happyture4 August 2012, 23:38 GMT +02:00

Dezzie i have been worried about you, i did send you a email but i understand now why you never replied, i wish you a speedy recovery Dez, :O)

90. xymonau21 August 2012, 2:21 GMT +02:00

Well, I haven't fully recovered yet, Mike, but I am getting slowly better (apart from getting a chest cold last week, and I'm still coughing!). I haven't returned to work yet, but I intend to next week, although probably only for several hours per day. I doubt that I will have the stamina to work a full day. I can't even talk on the phone for long without feeling exhausted.

I hope you're well and happy.

91. happyture23 August 2012, 0:06 GMT +02:00

Well Dezzie its good to see your here again and getting better, i have not been here for some time as i am doing a few more things now, I wish you a speedy recovery Dezzie :O)

92. xymonau23 August 2012, 1:26 GMT +02:00

It's good to see you. I'm glad you're busy - it keeps you off the streets.

My poor son is now in hospital with kidney failure. He is expected to recover, but it has added to the general angst. The fact that he's in Brisbane and I'm too sick to drive down has been frustrating, but he assures me he's fine.

I'll have to stop opening umbrellas inside.

93. happyture23 August 2012, 19:18 GMT +02:00

Oh dear, i had that when i was 16 years old, i was in hospital 3 months, but as you can see you cant kill a dog off that easy, it left me with scars on my Kidneys but im ok , yes you have a few miles between you but im sure he understands Dezzie, he knows your thinking of him :O)

94. xymonau23 August 2012, 22:17 GMT +02:00

Well, that gives me more confidence. Do you know what caused yours? I hope he isn't in hospital for that long, but I guess they have to do what is necessary. Since they're mostly keeping an eye on him for now, he thinks he won't be in there for too long. But he says he doesn't feel well, so I don't know.

Have you had any kidney problems as an adult? Did you have dialysis? (They won't have to do that for my son, they say.)

95. happyture29 August 2012, 6:55 GMT +02:00

I Have had kidney stones once as a adult but they think it was something to do with the chemicals i was working with at the time, simply because the tested one of the stones and they were made of the same compounds i was working with, So working back 30 odd years ago or more breathing in magnesium, limes, phosphates done me no good at all, as for dialysis no i was lucky as my kidneys improved as in they responded to medication, they use that if you go severely jaundice, Im sure your son will be ok Dezzie as they are really clever and know exactly what they are doing in hospitals now. :O)

96. xymonau29 August 2012, 8:25 GMT +02:00

Yes, he got out yesterday, but isn't well yet. He has to have a restricted diet and drink water all the time and return to outpatients for checks - the first tomorrow. He is surviving, and I hope for a full recovery.

Kidney stones are dreadful. I have one but it's in a place where it won't move, so I won't have the agony. Yes, chemicals cause a lot of damage to us, particularly when you're inhaling them.

Now, I want to know what you've done with your Ma. I haven't heard her shrieking lately.

97. happyture29 August 2012, 11:32 GMT +02:00

Me Ma?? Well, between me and yoo, i got fed up with the smell of toothpaste and wee so she has gone on holiday,,just for a week or sow, you know so i can have a rest, I got so tired of her eating the toothpaste and wetting herself while watching X Factor so HOLIDAY time it was for her, oh how i laffed when i recieved the postcard off her with HELP written in blood on it, Ahh at times she's just so funny:O) thanks for asking though Dezzie, Ma often asks about you too,,well not exactly you but just if you have a spare bedroom , anyway cant stop and chat im airing Ma's mattress which i think i should have put through the mangle first :O)

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