Well, it had to be done, didn't it? And since this is both the first and last post, I have won. Thank you all.
They wear tiny little glasses to find something were they can cause huge fees.
Instead, this one has found huge FLEAS. The prize is itching to come back to his mumsy.
The Prize says he has no interest in an etching of any kind. He much prefers water-colours.
But at your place he will find neither soap, nor water. In fact, it has been so long since you have seen water that you have forgotten what colour it is.
Don't be daft, the UK is an island - we can go in any direction we like and reach water!
So why don't you?
Why don't I what?
Well I do. By shower, sink or bath in my house. Tch! It's amazing what these Outback folks do without.
Don't fib. You don't have a house. You just kind of bash yourself against light fixtures all night.
Well, I can see the attraction... But no, I'm a survivor.
'Course 'e' as an 'ouse. It's one of em hi rise jam jar flats wot they put up in the sixties innit. Ev'n poked oles inna roof so ee could breeve like wot us edukated pepol duz.
Phil! Welcome back! How refreshing to have a towie amongst us.
No probs bruv.
Alright old chap, no need to throw a complete wobbler, one must keep one's upper lip stiff, what. One sees that the colonial seems to have done a bunk, top ho!
Do I haf to kip my upper lip stif? It meks talkin' dash difficult, what.
But you're right about the colonial - orf to see a kangaroo wallah, I expect. And not even back for tiffin!
Gosh you foreigners are funny. Very nice to see see you, Grandfather. How are the ladies? And that's enough with the "colonial". My boss met the Queen recently, and I have shooken the hand that shook hers. Why, that makes me almost nobility that does. And a winner as well. What more could I ask?
Well, you might be knobbly - I couldn't possibly comment - but I'm afraid you're not the winner. That's me.
If you commented I'd know you had been peering in my windows again, wouldn't I? And that just wouldn't do, would it? You should be afraid. I AM the winner. If anyone says I am not, then fear is an appropriate response.
Well, I sez you are not, and I yield not to fear. Just dodging very quickly.
I not only have a pointy stick, I have a can of insecticide. Touche!
Now you are fighting with live arms. I think Prizey and me, we are hiding to get out of your fireline.
Gesine, you are safe for now. Just let go of the prize, and no-one will be hurt.