Well, it had to be done, didn't it? And since this is both the first and last post, I have won. Thank you all.
The prize doesn't need a dining room to consume a constant diet of fowl soup. It needs a road trip to explore its true value and get a sense of its worth. I'll take it on a cruise ship to the Caribbean and let it sip drinks made with brown sugar and rum while sitting in the gentle warmth of the sun.
Chicken soup is so much better than alcohol for a little prize. And it will get skin cancer sitting in the sun. Besides, it gets seasick, so you'll have your hands full - literally. No, no - it is staying with its mumsy, safe and warm.
Yhe prize is an adventurist and a thrill seeker. It craves attention and the spotlight. Hiding it under the skirt of mumsy will only darken it with sorrow. I think it better that I take it to new heights. And don't you point that stick at me all half cocked!
Ah! Now I get it! You're talking about second prize! The first prize is a little sweetums and would never crave danger. It's a very timid millyun dollers.
I'm just back to find the prize sitting on my doorstep, tearful and trembling and begging me to take it back (which I'm very happy to do, needless to say). Between wails and much nose-blowing, it told me how it couldn't cope any more - something about having far too many barbies and the stress of living with the constant threat of a half-cocked pointy stick. Nice prizey, back to papa!
What have you lot been doing to my prize while I've not been here? He's been hauled off on a ship somewhere - and he doesn't sail very well, he's been threatened by a mad woman with a pointy stick ( I can't say to the sanity of this woman, he's a prize, not a psychiatrist) and then abducted by some moth creature.
It's just not good enough. In future, leave the poor little chap alone or you'll have me to answer to.
I can make the prize smile brightly with a chocolate chip cookie. He likes that much better than the bland fowl soup. And I don't have to prod him with a cocky pointy stick for him to eat it.
Lies! Damn-ed lies! macromouth, you walk in here causin' trubble, doncha? Tryin' to alienate the affections of my rightful tiny wee prizey.
Jimbo - I'm torn between bein' glad to see you an' wantin' to harm you. Decisions, decisions... At least you know he gets seasick.
Cris, he's allergic to chocolate. Only his mumsy would know that, of course. Now look what you've done. He's got a rash. Come to mummy, little fellow.
Happy New Year folks!
The prize has made a New Year's Resolution to resist the allure of the temptress - here with me, he can rest in safety in a non-sticky allergen-free zone. And yippee! we're off for a spending spree today in the sales. What a nice start to the year.
You may wonder what is blocking your doorway, mothman. It's ME! Hand it over.
Slips silently away through the back door...
...leaving the little prize with its mumsy. It dances with delight!
The only thing I'm spending today is some quality time with the prize. I made a spot on his favorite shelf.
I'll lend you some spot remover. The prize is coming home with me!
It's already been treated with spot preserver rendering your product ineffectual. The prize likes that fresh lemony smell on the shelf.
Then why have you chained it to the shelf? If it's so happy, why have you put it in that horrible cage?
To protect it from you! That was done at the request of the prize. Your bullock dray doesn't have air conditioning.
A likely story. My liitle prizy-kins can't talk. It can make sweet cooing noises, but only when it's happy at home with its mumsy. Bad Cris! Bad!
Anyway, an anthropomorphic personification doesn't need air con.
This one does. You have to feel its needs and desires to be a proper provider for such a lavish prize.
Funny munny - er - ahem! Cough! Munny has no needs or desires, just to be with its mumsy. You may have the plastic cup.
The prize is tired of all this arguing and has come to me. No cages, no shelves, no plastic cups (with or without horrid contents), no coughing - just enjoying an environment so naturally comfortable it doesn't even need air con. Now, what shall we buy first...
:)
A big "L" for your forehead?
In my possession, the prize will earn interest. Compounded daily. Now, that is something this anthropomorphic personification can do. Maybe it can find a companion of interest :)