Stumbled across this one - thought you might like it.
Oh is that the time, gotta go Dezzie its Ma's feed time again...
I yam beginnin' to fink there WOZ no prezzent. WOZ there?
Dont be silly dezzie,,Sorry,,,,What now Ma,,,cup of tea,,, back in 5
I been to every shop where you go. They all sez the same - he dinnet buy you nuffink. I has sent a brief outline of my quandary to her Maj, arstin' if I can come an' cast a eye over her stolen goods. Do you fink she'll reply?
I just cant believe you dont believe me, 17 shillings and sixpence halfpenny it cost me to post to the land down under, i have the consignment note ere in me paws an a tear in me eye cuz you dont believe me...
I nevva said that. You is my FRIEND an' you would nevva lie to me. Them shopkeepers is well-known for theys wicked ways. No, Hyme confrontin' the Queen herselluf. I want my prezzie!
Not wantin to hupset yew dezzie but Betty, and i call her that on a friendship basis, Betty has probably worn it out by now,,specially with prince Philip the was he is at the moment...
So it's a dress? Fit for a Queen? You is wunnerful, Mikey!
But you said she wore it out. It HAS to be a dress! She woodent wear long pants, wood she?
No,,only when she's out on her horse, she wears her jodhpurs then, she does love her horses does Betty :o)
You bought me jodhpurs?? Why??
I didn't says i bort you jodhpurs did i, you makin thing hup as i speeks..
Well, you won't TELL me! Nah, you diddent buy me nuffink. I yam seein' throo your web of lies! For shame, Mikey.
Dont go getting all haggresive on me now, juss cuz i wont tell you,,well it will only spoil it for next year wunit!
An how many years hazzit been since you started promissin' me a prezzie?
If i told you once ive told you a milyun times, stop exaggerating.....
I is hurt. You has stabbed me wiffa lance frew my 'art, you 'as. I fort our frenship woz real, butchoo 'as hurted me and blamed the Queen. Will yoo sttop to nuffink to save face, you big fibber?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! You said fibber, Dezzie, lets get one thing straight here, if there's on thing i cant stand is a "FIBBER" Whats the point of telling FIB'S you always get caught out,,,unless your really good at it like what i is...
*sob* You has made a ol' woman cry. No, not yer Ma, ME!
Me Ma's a BIGGER FIBBER than Tom Pepper!!!
Don't change the suject. She dinnet prommiss a prezzie.
I has no patience wiffa fibber. You has been crosseded off my birfday list.