Stumbled across this one - thought you might like it.
Ooh! My heart's all a-flutter! I likes a man wot uses haftershave!
Well it hides the smell of wee nicely, Ma told me to carry mothballs in me pocket but ladies dont like the smell of thems much, and the Talc soak up the sweat in no time.....
Oh, is that the time? I really have to be going...
"WHAT" what i say,,,why does i have that effect on ladies,,their legs is running before i put um down,,,WHY!why,why???
Okay, I'll tells ya, butchoo hafta sit down an' be reasonabubble. It could be the wee. Now, call me fussy, but I jus' can't swoon over a fella wot smells of wee. An wee plus haftershave - a perfumier's delight, you might fink - well, it jus' don't do it for me.
Coojoo perhaps - han' thissiz justa suggestion - use the flippin' toilet like NORMAL people??!!
Its havin the thyme to go two the toylet, i,m rushing here and rushing there with little or no thyme hinbeetween, Butt i,ll give it a tri juss four yew OK!
Try to stop rushin' here. Then you juss gotta rush there, an' you will have more time.
Was that the tip for the day? my days are filled,,yes filled to the brim with here's and there's and have been for a long thyme cant stop now...
No. I cannot believe you can't choose to ignore the heres. Why, I've been hignorin' 'em for years. 'Mazing fact is Heye yam no better orf.
If the here's where as close as the there's i might have given them up, but they aint so i,m not!
Sticking out heres is the real problem. You trips over 'em an' has to pay attenshun. Why, some folks pays big munny to has they heres pinneded back!
Ha funny thing is my head grew to match me ears, perfect'o balance of big head n big ears...
My son felt very self-conscious about his ears sticking out - they really didn't much - and at the age of 13 he wanted plastic surgery. He got it. But it was a bit of a trial. He was bandaged up like a mummy. Then something started bleeding, and he had to go back into hospital. Anyway, he says he would have it all over again, and although I was worried, I knew how badly he felt about himself, and I guess I would allow it all over again, too. To this day he hates anyone touching his ears, though. They still feel sensitive and a bit numb.
Ahhh thats so sad, bless him, one of my friends was exactly the same, he would go on and on about them, really he made them sound worse himself, i didn't really notice, but he had his done too, and to be honest i could hardly tell after, only that he was different in himself, he'd approach girls and be the first up on the disco floor, direct opposite to how he was before he had them done, funny really i think 90% is in the mind!!
It's so true. The whole attraction thing is often about attitude. Yes, looks are great, but if that's all there is, then it's going to be a very dull time for all.
Yeah,,Ma said i was that ugly as a baby she fed me with a catapult, of course i dont beleave her, well i didn't untill she showed me the catapult...
Obviously she missed quite a lot.
Ahhhhhhhhhh,,,"sharp intake of breath" You,,you,,
Lovely woman? Amazing person? Intelligent wunderkin? May have all my money and all my cameras?
I,ll tell you all bout me new camera as soon as i find the on button..?
See the other thread. I can help you, but I must first receive the camera. I'll give it back. Honest.
All i can say is,,,Your a naughty,,naughty,,,naughty gurl......
Oh yeah,,And me Ma warned me bout ladies like you,,,,I never listened,,,but she warned me.......
Oh, I'm not THAT sort of lady. I'm only rotten to the core, and after your brand new camera.
OOPS. Did I type that out loud?